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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26296879">Inquiring Minds Want to Know</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/anarchycox/pseuds/anarchycox'>anarchycox</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Witcher Bingo Card Prompts [18]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crude Talk, First Time Bottoming, Fluff and Crack, Happy Sex, Idiots in Love, Lambert being Lambert, M/M, New Relationship, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sex, clueless characters, eskel pov, lambert is always right, laughing during sex, sarcastic, sex for scientific inquiry, sex with feels</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 08:54:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,511</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26296879</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/anarchycox/pseuds/anarchycox</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Lambert feels that Geralt has become a moron since he began his relationship with Jaskier. But he can't figure out why. Finally he decides it must be sex while in love makes someone stupid. He wants to confirm his theory, and demands that Eskel have sex with him, so he can sort out the whole situation. </p><p>Eskel decides to just roll with it all.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eskel/Lambert (The Witcher)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Witcher Bingo Card Prompts [18]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1746034</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>79</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>298</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Inquiring Minds Want to Know</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>for surprise advice on my bingo card (yes this is a bit of a stretch but there is advice in the fic and lambert wanting to fuck is a hell of a surprise to eskel).</p><p>eskel calls lambert rote which is short for hertis rote or my heart's root</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Ugh!” </p><p>Eskel didn’t look up from book he was reading. Lambert clearly wanted to bitch and he needed someone near when he did it, but you weren’t actually required to pay attention. He barely listened because it was another rant about Geralt and Jaskier. As it had been for the last month. Usually he could figure out why something was bothering Lambert, but this one had him at a loss; he might complain, but Lambert would want Geralt happy. Lambert was pacing as he ranted about seeing them kiss, and Eskel had to roll his eyes a bit, which he hated doing because it pulled at the scars some. </p><p>“They are in love, they are allowed to kiss.”</p><p>“Eskel,” Lambert was in front of him and the book was out of his hands. Eskel gave him a look and held up a hand, but the book was not returned to him. “I went to the armory to get a few supplies -”</p><p>“And saw them kissing. Lambert they are finally together after years of wanting each other, I think that you can be a little kinder. A difficult thing for you, yes but -”</p><p>“Oh, and you would be just fine walking in and seeing Geralt’s face buried in Jaskier’s ass?” Lambert snapped.</p><p>Eskel paused. “No, that is fair. I don’t especially want to walk in on that either. Fun to do, bit odd to watch if it is Geralt.” He wondered why Lambert was looking at him like that, but ignored it. “I’ll talk to Geralt.” He understood new love, but really, certain acts should be done in the privacy of a bedchamber. Or at least not the very public spaces. He reached for his book and it wasn’t given back to him. “What else?” Because clearly there was more and Lambert wanted him to pay attention. “Lambert?” Eskel was a touch concerned because Lambert wasn’t saying anything. When he was quiet that meant there was a true problem. “Tell me?” he didn’t demand, just asked softly.</p><p>“He’s different with Jaskier. Is it because it’s another man?”</p><p>“Maybe a little. But probably more about the relationship itself.” Eskel shrugged. “With Jaskier it isn’t sex then feelings, like many of his other experiences. It is feelings and then sex. They know each other. They are equal in their love for each other. It makes it different. I would guess, anyways.”</p><p>“Love makes you an idiot? That’s bullshit, I’ve been in love with you for years, and I’m perfectly sensible,” Lambert declared. </p><p>“What?” Eskel blinked. He had not just heard that. But Lambert wasn’t running away, or trying to pretend it was a joke. He was just standing there, jaw tight. Waiting for a response. “I…it couldn’t make you an idiot because you already were one?” He was relieved that Lambert laughed. It was all a joke, it had to be.</p><p>“But, from the stories that Geralt tells, he has been in love with Jaskier for a fair bit of time. The sex is new. Maybe it is the combination of sex and love that makes you a moron.” Lambert nodded, “Blood does leave your head to fill your cock, and the rate they are fucking it is never getting a chance to return to their heads. Thus, the being complete morons, and thinking it is a good idea to fuck in the armory.”</p><p>Eskel could see Lambert thinking, and generally that particular gaze was a point of concern, but he was too busy stuck a few sentences ago when Lambert casually declared his love. Maybe though he had misheard. “Lambert, I need you to confirm for me - did you say you love me?”</p><p>“Yeah, keep up, I am solving this problem.”</p><p>“The you love me problem?”</p><p>“No, the question of whether feelings mixed with sex makes you an idiot. Because loved you at least half a dozen years, stayed smart. I’ve fucked a ton of women, stayed smart. So is it that when you combine the mutual confirmation and resolution of emotional bonds with sex, that you destroy your thought processes?”</p><p>“I generally find I lose thought processes when I have a dick up my ass,” Eskel said. Lambert went very still. “What?”</p><p>“You need to fuck me.”</p><p>Eskel went to a shelf in the library and pulled a book down about meditation and finding inner peace. It was hollow and had a flask in it. He drained the flask dry. “I need to fuck you.”</p><p>“Yes, it is logical. We love each other -”</p><p>“We do?” This was honestly news to Eskel.</p><p>“I said that already, keep up.”</p><p>Eskel went to the book on toxic flora and fauna and drained the flask in that one dry as well. “No, you said you loved me.”</p><p>“Yeah, but you love me too, we just were ignoring those feelings, because life of a witcher, the path, blah blah blah. But if Vesemir is letting Geralt get away with true loving that bard, we can finally acknowledge our feelings. And fuck, to see if a dick up the ass will make me an idiot.” Lambert nodded. “Your room or mine?”</p><p>“My bed is better.”</p><p>“Sure. I’ve seen men fuck at a couple brothels, and I’ve seen a lot in the last few weeks, pretty sure I understand the basics. Let’s go.”</p><p>Eskel watched Lambert leave and he debated also drinking the flask in thirty knots for everyday use, but then the implication of Lambert’s words seeped into his mind. “Wait, what?” Eskel ran after Lambert but bounced right into Geralt as he rounded the corner. “Not now.”</p><p>“Where is Lambert? I need to apologize to him, for what he walked in on,” Geralt said. “Though he really should have knocked.”</p><p>That stopped Eskel. “At the armory?” Eskel gave him a look and was pleased when Geralt was a bit abashed. “I get it, wolf, I do, but you need to be more considerate. You put weird thoughts in Lambert’s head and now I have to deal with them.”</p><p>“If he has a problem with Jaskier and I -” Eskel could see that Geralt was getting ready to go all noble and self righteous, and he did not have the goddamn time for that right now.</p><p>“No, he wants to study if it is just that you are an idiot, or if the combination of love and getting dicked makes everyone an idiot. And since he and I are apparently in love, I now am to meet him in my room and fuck him so he can find out if he’ll grow as stupid as you.”</p><p>Eskel and Geralt just sort of stared at each other.</p><p>“I think that I am going to find Jaskier, because those sentences confused and scared me.”</p><p>“How do you think I feel? I didn’t know I was in love with Lambert!” Eskel was low key panicking. “You put thoughts in his damn head, Geralt, and once I have those sorted, I am coming for you. So you better hide, wolf.”</p><p>“Do you love him?”</p><p>“He said I did, and he is annoyingly right about people, so I must be.” Eskel huffed a bit and shoved Geralt out of his way. “Now I am going to go give Lambert my dick, and then I am going to kill you. And it is my night to cook. Fuck this day has gotten busier than I planned.”</p><p>“I could do the cooking tonight?” Geralt offered.</p><p>“Thank you. Right, I have meat soaking in garlic, onion is ready to go. Put it all in the dish with some broth from last night’s soup put it in the oven and it is will be fine.” Eskel was relieved he didn’t have that worry anymore. Just fucking Lambert and then killing Geralt. He forgot about Geralt as he headed up to the bedchamber wing. His door was open a bit and he walked in, and almost fell to his knees. He managed to close the door, because he did not want anyone else to see what he was seeing.</p><p>Lambert was naked on Eskel’s bed. Those shoulders, the forearms holding him up. Eskel realized he had spent decades noticing those forearms without registering he had been doing that. Thighs. Fuck those thighs from all the walking Lambert did, since he hated horses. He was on his knees, arms holding his torso up. Eskel knew every scar on the man’s body, every freckle, but this was like seeing him for the first time. “Lambert?”</p><p>“This is the way you do this, right?”</p><p>“You really haven’t done this before,” Eskel approached. He shouldn’t touch, but there was that pale skin, Lambert hated the sun. He ran a finger up the back of Lambert’s thigh, watched the muscle quiver, heard the noise in Lambert’s throat.</p><p>“No,” Lamber replied. “But it is for science.”</p><p>“It should be for pleasure,” Eskel pressed a hand to the small of Lambert’s back. He pushed down, but Lambert resisted and the feel of that strength under his fingers made his head swim. “It should be because you want it.”</p><p>“Do you really think I’d be here, like this if I didn’t want it? When do I ever do something I don’t want to do?” Lambert twisted his head and Eskel met his gaze. “I want this.”</p><p>“Because you love me.”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“And because I love you.” Eskel pressed again and Lambert eased down until he was lying on the bed. All that length on his furs. Wanting, waiting to be taken. Eskel began to strip off his clothes.</p><p>“Yeah.” Lambert sounded so sure of Eskel’s heart, a thing that Eskel had never once himself been sure of.</p><p>“How do you know?”</p><p>“Because if you didn’t love me, you wouldn’t have walked through that door.”</p><p>In an instant, everything the Eskel had ever understood about himself, about Lambert shifted. A thousand conversations, a million touches all realigned in his brain.</p><p>In his heart.</p><p>Once his whole world shifted in the cosmos, the chaos in himself quieted. He could only nod. “I did walk through the door.” He was naked and climbed onto the bed. He was broader than Lambert, thicker. Lambert had strong muscles but he ran more ropey, coiled strength ready to spring in comparison to Geralt or Eskel. There was a small grunt when he settled his weight on Lambert but he wasn’t elbowed or forced off. Instead he covered the man, reached and linked their fingers together. They lay like that for a bit,  Eskel’s weight pressing him down, him breathing in the metallic scent that lingered on Lambert from his swords, from his experiments with bomb making. Below that there was skin, and desire. Lambert wanted him.</p><p>Fuck, he wanted the man too. </p><p>Eskel kissed his shoulder. “Lambert?”</p><p>“Hmm?”</p><p>“We don’t need to fuck to prove your theory or not. We already know you are an idiot.” That got him shifted off, and he rolled onto his back, let Lambert cage him. He smiled up at the man. He always looked so pissed off, Eskel loved it. He loved all of it.</p><p>“Why the fuck am I an idiot?” </p><p>“Because you should have told me I love you years ago.”</p><p>“I thought you knew! It was so obvious how we felt about each other, we just were taking it like slow and shit.” Lambert was staring at him. “I never once punched you outside training.”</p><p>He really hadn’t. Eskel was the one to calm Lambert, to see what the real pain under the rage was. Lambert in turn made him laugh, made it all less weary. Eskel reached up and pulled him into a kiss. When he let go, Lambert looked a bit dazed. “What are you like in bed?” Eskel asked.</p><p>“I don’t know.”</p><p>“You’ve fucked before.” The man talked about it often enough, though Eskel had always hated that, jealous he finally understood.</p><p>“Not a man. Not you,” Lambert replied. “So no damn clue.”</p><p>“Let’s find out,” Eskel pulled him in for another kiss. He brought Lambert close and they moved so they were laying on their sides, bodies pressed as close as they could. Eskel started slow and gentle but that made Lambert a bit restless. He tugged on Lambert’s lower lip with his teeth and caused a moan. “Teeth?”</p><p>“Yeah,” Lambert agreed. “That feels nice.”</p><p>Eskel thought of all the times he had seen Lambert chewing his lip as he worked, how it had always distracted him from whatever task he had been doing. But now he could nibble as much as he wanted. He bit at the lip again and ran a hand down Lambert’s side, over the rough texture from where a monster had once dragged the witcher over gravel. The kisses were open mouth now and he was so hungry to taste Lambert that he pressed his tongue into Lambert’s mouth.</p><p>And was immediately bitten. Eskel reared his head back and looked at Lambert, who looked a mix of repulsed and ashamed. “I’m sorry, I just didn’t expect that.”</p><p>“And you dislike it?” There was a nod. “That’s fine,” Eskel promised. He could feel his pulse in this tongue but there was no blood taste. “It’s fine,” he swore and pressed their foreheads together. “Anything else you don’t like?”</p><p>“Don’t touch my feet? Don’t be mean?”</p><p>“So, no pain?” Eskel wasn’t sure he understood.</p><p>“Don’t say mean things.”</p><p>Lambert looked the most open and vulnerable that Eskel had ever seen him. “Never,” Eskel promised, “Never Lam.” He rolled on top of him. “Like your dick sucked?”</p><p>“Fuck, yes, who doesn’t?”</p><p>Eskel bit Lambert’s neck and enjoyed the way his body tried to arch under Eskel’s weight. “Good to know,”Eskel said but he didn’t hurry down Lambert’s body when he had such a feast under him. Instead he took his time, learned Lambert’s body in a new way. They had all touched, injury care, massage after training, they knew each other’s bodies, but not like this. Eskel learned with fingers and mouth, which scars were sensitive, which were dead skin. That Lambert loved having his nipples bit but not laved with tongue. He learned that right around his belly button the man was very ticklish, and only witcher fast reflexes kept him from getting a knee to sensitive regions. He could feel the tension and worry in Lambert, and he laughed bit at the man’s hip. </p><p>“Relax, Lam, it doesn’t have to be perfect.”</p><p>“Seems bloody perfect whenever I’ve seen the other idiots.”</p><p>“Perfect for them. We aren’t them.”</p><p>“Thank fuck for that,” Lambert agreed. “I can…touch you right?”</p><p>“Lambert, I would very much love it if you sank your fingers into my hair, forced me down on your cock.” Eskel had to chuckle a bit at how quickly Lambert’s fingers were in his hair, moving his head to Lambert’s cock which was half hard and filling quickly. It was a good cock, smaller than his, but most were. He laughed a bit.</p><p>“You better not be laughing at my dick.”</p><p>“No, it is a great dick,” Eskel reassured and licked at the tip, grazed his teeth over the foreskin and didn’t that make Lambert make interesting noises. He did it again. “I’ve just heard Jaskier shout about Geralt’s big dick. And I’m bigger.”</p><p>“Ha, should I start shouting some of the stuff I’ve heard the bard call out?” Lambert’s fingers were pressed against his scalp and Eskel loved the pressure. “Uhh, fill me up with your great big cock. I need it, so much, so…hungry for you…Daddy?”</p><p>Eskel had to sit up, broke Lambert’s hold on him. “Wait, you actually heard Jaskier call Geralt Daddy?” He had no idea what he thought about that.</p><p>“Yes sir, I surely did.” Lambert looked disturbed. “I am not judging -”</p><p>“You are.”</p><p>“Yeah, I am,” Lambert agreed. “I just know I shouldn’t. Besides eventually, I’m sure we’ll like something they’d secretly judge us for, so it balances out.”</p><p>It was Lambert logic, and sometimes it was honestly easier to just accept it, besides he had to tell the man something. “I don’t like that sort of talk in bed.”</p><p>“Oh, thank Melitele because I was not calling you Daddy ever. Fathers are fucked up creatures and you are great, so that was not happening.”</p><p>“I love you,” Eskel said and smoothed his thumb along the frown between Lambert’s eyes. “I love you so fucking much.”</p><p>“I know you do, it was always obvious.”</p><p>Eskel really wished it had been obvious to him, but that didn’t matter, they were here now. “I meant in general. I don’t like people talking about how big my dick is in bed? Whores always do it, and it is just…exhausting. I know I have a big dick. It always just feels awkward. Especially the ‘I don’t know if it will fit talk?”</p><p>“I mean I’ve seen your dick a bunch, bigger than me, but it isn’t really that big, is it?” Lambert scooted up the bed until he was sitting up. “Go on, show me then?”</p><p>“What you want me to jack off while you watch?”</p><p>“Yes,” Lambert replied. He was grinning. “Apparently it is impressive. I wanna see.”</p><p>Eskel rolled his eyes. “I’m not making a show of it like they do in a brothel.” The conversation had killed his desire a bit but just looking at Lambert had him stirring. “You too.”</p><p>“Sure,” Lambert agreed and began to stroke his cock, easily, not minding the gaze on him. “I like being watched.”</p><p>“I usually don’t,” Eskel replied. He watched Lambert’s hand on himself so that he didn’t have to see Lambert watching him. “For obvious reasons.” All witchers carried scars, but he had the most of them all.</p><p>“Bet you get sick of the whores telling you that your scars make you more beautiful, and rugged. Marks of honour and all that?” He watched Lambert lick his palm and then keep stroking. He was hypnotized by it. “It’s bullshit of course, because they don’t make you more gorgeous, they don’t make you ugly. They just make you you. I remember before them, I see you now. I find you attractive because you are you. I do kinda wanna lick them though, trace them with my tongue. Is that bad?”</p><p>“No, it isn’t bad at all, so long as it is every single scar and you take as long as it needs to, no matter how much I beg for more.”</p><p>“Fuck,” Lambert groaned. He moved his hand away. “There is me. What about you?”</p><p>Eskel stroked himself a bit more and then moved his had away. He waited for gasps, moans, a look of revulsion. But it was just Lambert’s face. He actually wasn’t sure what to do with the non reaction. “Lambert? You love me but you do have a sexual interest in me, right? We are not doing this if -”</p><p>“I have pushed out a bigger shit than that, because you know how potions can block you up for a bit, so if it can go out, I’d imagine that can fit in just fine. Let’s do this.” Lambert pushed up and was kneeling just like he was. He had such a happy look on his face, the absurd, crass, beautiful man. Eskel started to laugh, and had to rest his head on Lambert’s shoulder. He just kept laughing. “What?” Lambert asked.</p><p>“I’ve fucked a few men before, but trust you to make it a new and unique experience.”</p><p>“Always knew I was special,” Lambert kissed the top of his head. “Always knew you were special too. Though I don’t have a lot of reference for your dick size, so I’ll take your word for it that you are hung.”</p><p>“I like to be fucked too, just so you know,” Eskel told him. “Would you rather that tonight?”</p><p>“No, that will be for later scientific inquiry. Sweeting, you are going to fuck me.”</p><p>“After I suck you off a bit, because I really want to do that.” Eskel pushed Lambert so that he fell on the bed and hoped that the hair hanging in his eyes would hide how much being called such a term affected him. He moved down Lambert’s body and began to lick Lambert’s cock. Lambert’s fingers were in his hair, the pressure as perfect as before. He pulled the cock into his mouth and sank almost all the way down, set a steady rhythm pressed his tongue against the underneath. Lambert’s hips began to chase after his mouth when he would pull almost off and Eskel pushed Lambert’s legs more open.</p><p>He wasn’t going to lie, the whine that Lambert gave when he lifted away went straight to his cock, made him wonder how many needy sounds he could wring from the man. “I just need something from my chest.”</p><p>“What?” </p><p>“It isn’t ideal but white honey can be used to open you up, slick my cock so I don’t hurt you.”</p><p>“What would you use usually?”</p><p>“A particular oil, or there is this rendered -” He could see Lambert’s brain kicking over into a different sort of experimentation mode. “No,” Eskel said hurriedly. “Later, I will explain what can be used and you can get samples from Geralt and Jaskier to see what you can replicate and improve. But no one will be leaving this room until they are well satisfied.” He went to the chest and retrieved the potion. He settled back in between Lambert’s thighs. “Do you want me to suck you off while I open you up, or talk to you as I do it?”</p><p>“You keep saying that like I understand. Which I totally do, but let’s just say I didn’t. What would it mean?”</p><p>Eskel could not resist and kissed Lambert’s nose. “If I just push my dick into you it will hurt you, could cause tearing. But if I start smaller with fingers, get you accustomed to the intrusion, stretch you a bit, it will make it easier, more comfortable.” He could see Lambert didn’t quite get it. “How you swing your arms, warm up the muscles before you have to throw a bomb a long distance.”</p><p>“Oh, yeah sure, makes sense.” Lambert nodded. “How should I be? On fours right?”</p><p>“I’d like to see you face,” Eskel replied. “How you are is fine.” He grabbed a pillow and put it under Lambert. “Mouth or voice?” </p><p>“Voice,” Lambert said. “Can I touch my dick while you are doing it?”</p><p>“Because you want to be a show for me?” There was a nod. “That sounds good, rote.” He saw Lambert smile, knew the man understood the half endearment. Eskel opened the potion and poured a bit on his fingers. “Move your legs a part a bit more. Can plant your feet if you want.” He pressed his finger just behind Lambert’s balls, scraped his nail there just a little. He smirked at the shout Lambert let out. He trailed the finger down, pressed it against his hole. “Have you ever anything?” There was a shake of head. “Stay relaxed, don’t tense up. Be good and listen to my voice.”</p><p>Lambert shivered a bit, and Eskel carefully pressed the tip of his finger in. He waited for a reaction from the man, but Lambert was just laying there, slowly stroking his cock, as he watched Eskel. “Your finger is in my ass.”</p><p>“Well just a bit of it.” Eskel put his other hand on Lambert’s thigh and pressed in. “Now my finger is in your ass.” He stroked Lambert’s thigh. He watched Lambert carefully as he pulled it almost out and then pushed back in. “How is it?”</p><p>“It is a finger in my ass. I don’t know? I don’t want to punch you.”</p><p>“That works for now,” Eskel agreed. He continued the steady rhythm and watched Lambert. He could watch him for hours like this. Remembered all the times he had watched Lambert, enraptured by the focus the man had when he was interested in a task. “More?”</p><p>“Sure,” Lambert agreed. </p><p>Eskel pulled out and Lambert made a face at that. “I know, it feels odd when you are empty after something has been in you.” A bit more of the potion and he pressed two fingers in. He felt Lambert’s thigh start to tense under his hand. “Shh, rote, breathe for me. Be good for me,” he crooned and watched the tense muscles begin to relax. “So good, thank you.” He pressed as he stroked inside Lambert until his middle finger brushed that spot. Eskel pressed.</p><p>“What the fuck?” Lambert shouted. “Eskel why are you making my toes curls, what did you do?”</p><p>“Spot there, makes things feel good.”</p><p>“Yes it does. More,” Lambert demanded. He was squeezing his cock hard, “Fuck, sweeting, more.”</p><p>“Everything, I think. For as long as we have.” Eskel lost himself in fingering Lambert, watching him react to the new experience, when he was no longer able to catalogue the experience and just felt. “I cannot believe you, Lambert. You are so pliant, giving under my hands. You’d give me so much, and I promise I’ll not take that for granted. You are so good. Fuck, rote, you break me apart.”</p><p>“No, I won’t break you. Never break the things that matter. And you fucking matter.”</p><p>“That was meant to be romantic.”</p><p>“It was stupid, I won’t break you, never been that mean to you, sweeting.” Lambert was glaring at him. “I won’t break you. That is romantic.”</p><p>“It is,” Eskel had to kiss him. He leaned over pressed their mouths together. “Ready for more?”</p><p>“I am. You won’t break me.”</p><p>“No I never would.” Eskel moved back and a bit more potion, eased three fingers into Lambert. “Relax, remember not to tense up.”</p><p>“Eskel, you have a third of your hand in my ass, it is a tense situation. Press that spot again to distract me.” Eskel did as ordered, stroke Lambert’s prostate until the man relaxed. “And your dick is bigger.”</p><p>“It is.” </p><p>“Interesting.”</p><p>“Is it?”</p><p>“We’ll find out.”</p><p>“Lambert, do you like this?” Eskel had to ask, concerned. Because he wanted Lambert to enjoy this and if he wasn’t, they would change what they were doing. “Rote?”</p><p>“Do you think I would have told you to put three fingers up my asshole if I wasn’t enjoying it?” Lambert rolled his eyes a bit. “It is weird and uncomfortable but a good uncomfortable? I don’t know. It is just. You are in me, and it is good. All good.”</p><p>Eskel nodded and focused on fingering him, praised Lambert, saying words he never thought he would have to the man, words he hadn’t known were bottled up inside him. But they poured out. He raised a brow and Lambert gave a nod. Eskel moved and pulled his fingers out. He slicked up his cock and settled in between Lambert’s legs. He opened his mouth and smiled at Lambert’s growl.</p><p>“I won’t tell you to breathe and relax,” Eskel said.</p><p>Lambert lightly kicked him. “You just sort of did.”</p><p>Eskel lined up and began to press into Lambert. Every cliche there was about fucking ran through his head, and ran right back out because he wasn’t capable of holding a thought more complex than that he was fucking into Lambert. And nothing had ever felt better. He wanted to say something perfect, romantic. “Your ass is a fucking vise.” He groaned both in pleasure and embarrassment.</p><p>Lambert laughed and his legs hooked around Eskel, pulled him in. “This feels so fucking weird.”</p><p>“Feels fairly fucking perfect to me,” Eskel choked on his breath as he pressed in as much as he could. “Fuck, Lambert.”</p><p>“Yup, that is what we are doing. And it hurts but in a good way. Learning something about myself right now.”</p><p>“Stop thinking.”</p><p>“Make me. Remember you are supposed to fuck me stupid?” Lambert arched up a bit. “And your cock does feel like it is big inside me.”</p><p>Eskel moved his hips back and then pressed forward again. He angled as best as he could and the way that Lambert gasped, he figured that was the right way to go about this. He braced his arms, hard and began to set a pace. He started slow but every time he looked down, saw Lambert’s gaze, saw the awe and love on the man’s face he picked up the pace. He could feel Lambert still stroking himself. “Another time, want to watch you ride me, put on a show for me as you rock yourself on my cock.”</p><p>“Thought you didn’t like talk?”</p><p>“I don’t like crap talk. All I can think about is the million ways I want you, rote,”  Eskel lowered down in a push up and kissed Lambert, bit his lower lip. “I won’t ever be able to let go of you after this.”</p><p>“Even your muscles will cramp if you hold on forever.”</p><p>“Again, Lambert being fucking romantic.”</p><p>“Just focus on the fucking, later you can make me bombs or something. That would be romantic.”</p><p>Eskel almost collapsed on Lambert because he was laughing at how absurd their first time together was, and how that was perfect. He began to thrust harder, and Lambert tensed underneath him, cursed and the muscle clench around his cock when Lambert was coming was almost the wrong side of painful. “Fuck, fuck, fuckkkkkk,” Lambert growled and that was enough to tip Eskel over. He pressed in, when he meant to pull out, and came inside Lambert. When the waves stopped rolling through his nerves, he lost focus and collapsed on top of Lambert.</p><p>It was a sharp angle and hurt his spent cock. He pulled out and moved them so that he could hold Lambert close. “Sorry,” Eskel said and he was panting enough the word was broken in three spots.</p><p>“Why?”</p><p>“Come leaking out your ass is a weird sensation, didn’t mean to make you deal with it your first time.”</p><p>“That is what you say to meet right after the first time we fuck?” Lambert sounded stunned. “Really? You who has read every romantic poem and play on the fucking continent have the pillow talk of ‘sorry about the come leak’?”</p><p>Eskel buried his face in Lambert’s neck. “Your ass is gonna be sore. Small of your back too. Also, probably should mention -”</p><p>“No, you shouldn’t, I can probably guess.” Lambert rolled in his arms, and Eskel appreciated the gentle kiss he was given. “Now, listen to me be actually romantic.”</p><p>Eskel gave him a fond smile, sure that now Lambert would let out that soft and gentle side that was buried deep deep within him. “Yes, rote?”</p><p>“I have to thank you, for everything just now. Because you have proved that love and sex together does make someone an idiot. Because right now you were a fucking moron. Oh, and you fucked me. As of yet I’ve only seen Geralt fuck Jaskier. So the person in love, who does the fucking is rendered the idiot and the fuckee retains their intelligence.”</p><p>“I thought you said Jaskier was an idiot.”</p><p>“Yes, but I think that is his natural state of being. Ergo sex didn’t make him an idiot because he already was one.”</p><p>“And yourself?”</p><p>Lambert was touching the scars on Eskel’s face, gentle and arousing at the same time. “Well I got everything I ever wanted, and you aren’t running for the hills, so clearly I am the smartest one here.” Eskel watched his smile fall. “You…aren’t running for the hills are you?”</p><p>Eskel rolled on top of him. “Not unless it is to chase a witcher who has gone rogue and needs to be brought in for punishment.”</p><p>“What witcher went rogue? There are four of us and we are all here and being mostly normal and oh that is a sex thing isn’t it?”</p><p>“Maybe you were rendered a bit of an idiot after all,” Eskel teased and kissed him. “Now, how does your ass feel?”</p><p>“Yeah, everything is all weird down there, worth it, but weird.”</p><p>“I have something in my chest that should help a bit.”</p><p>“What is it?”</p><p>“A wood dick.”</p><p>“How the fuck is that going to help?”</p><p>“Let me show you,” Eskel kissed Lambert and went to his chest. “Oh, remind me later I want to kill Geralt.”</p><p>“Sure, can I help? I have thought of nine effective ways to murder his soul, four for actual murder.”</p><p>Eskel stood and just looked at Lambert. “I really love you.”</p><p>“I know I told you did like what an hour or two ago. Keep up. Now I think the first step is killing his hair. Let me tell you about this plan I came up with when I was fifty. It is brilliant and we’ll probably only lose a limb or two making it happen.”</p><p>Eskel slicked the cock and pressed it into Lambert and they got busy enough with that, they rather forgot their murder Geralt plans. </p>
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